The First Dance Jitters
Good morning! I hope everyone had a spectaular weekend — and congrats to all our 8-8-08 Connecticut brides!
I was talking with some industry friends recently about the epic first dance and all the anticipation, trepidation, and hesitation that couples go through preparing for it. If you and your partner are shy or born with two left feet, the first dance is naturally going to work up your nerves. I don’t think I’ve met too many couples who haven’t been nervous about their first dance. I’ve even come across some who want to forgo the tradition all together because they are self-conscious about being in front of a crowd. I don’t recommend skipping your first dance. It’s not only a tradition that your guests expect and love to see, but it’s also something that you will regret not having done; don’t let little moments like these slip away because they are important memories that you’ll look back on in the years to come. The first dance is also an important transition from your entrance into dinner. I’ve been to weddings where the first dance was skipped and it is a bit awkward when couples enter the room for the first time as husband and wife and “take a seat” instead.
So, what do I recommend for overcoming your first dance stage fright? For starters – get over it! You are surrounded by your family and friends.. these people love and support you unconditionally. They don’t care if you can’t dance. As a matter of fact, since you are from the same gene pool, it’s pretty likely that they can’t dance either! The first dance is not about aesthetics or trying to impress… it is an intimate moment that you two share with your guests and it is a fun time to “catch up” on the day’s events as you wiz around the dance floor. It is a very emotional time and not something that comes along often…
If you’re finding it hard to take my first piece of advice, than consider these few tips.
Choose a song that not only has meaning, but has a rhythm that you can dance to. Spend the time researching the perfect song that has a rhythm you both can understand and move to.
Practice! Dance in the kitchen, dance in the living room. Dance, dance, dance! Practice dancing to your song. It’ll make it easier on the big day.
Consider taking a few dance lessons. I like dance lessons for two reasons – one, you get a few tips from a professional which will help boost your confidence. The second thing I love is it is some scheduled time that you two spend together on a Wednesday night. During the weeks leading up to your wedding you may not see each other as often as you like, and this is a perfect way to schedule in a pre wedding date night.
Have the DJ invite your wedding party onto the dance floor a minute or two into the song. With your wedding party joining you a minute or two into the song, you’ll be able to relax a bit and enjoy yourself. You’ll only be in the spotlight for a few moments which will appease Grandma and allow the photographer to get some really beautiful pictures.
Tomorrow… some advice on whether to choreograph your first dance..
The Thank You Card
When you get engaged there will be a lot of opportunities to send out thank you cards. Throughout your engagement, people will often send you gifts, have get-togethers in your honor, and mail you cards of well wishes and happily-ever-afters. Many people are curious about etiquette involving thank you cards, especially when it concerns marriage and all the opportunities there are during the process to send them. When do you send thank you cards? Do you send them for engagement gifts, attending an engagement party, shower gifts, or what about a thank you card for a card? I believe it is important to send a written thank you, even if it is thanking someone for sending you a card. We all have, at one time or another, sent someone a card congratulating them on something (such as an engagement or a new home) and never heard from them. We’re often left to wonder if our card ever reached its destination.
Since there are so many opportunities to “send thanks” to your loved ones, it doesn’t hurt to stock up on thank you cards. Having them handy is one more step to ensure that they are mailed promptly. If you “collect” stationary, like me, than it also doesn’t hurt to shop around for a variety of stationary. Personally, I like to sort my stationary into classes, meaning, I send my expensive “boutique” stationary to the recipients who notice and appreciate letterpress or card stock, while I send my “mass produced” stationary to the recipient who wouldn’t notice those finer details. I also believe in never sending the same thank you card twice, so it is always good to have a variety on hand for that purpose!
I’ve found some really beautiful card collections at Target which fit my personal style. The thank you card pictured to the right and the cards pictured above are part of three different collections I purchased at Target, and are the primary thank you cards I sent out for the beautiful engagement gifts we received. As I said above, I purchased a variety of cards to ensure that I never sent someone the same card twice. I’ve found that Target has a wonderful selection of formal, traditional, romantic, artsy, modern, and unique cards. The main advantage, along with the stylish selection, is the affordability. Most of their card collections are between $4-10 dollars for 8-12 cards per package.
For those wondering, etiquette mandates that you send a thank you card for engagement gifts as soon as they arrive. You should send a thank you for gifts you receive at your bridal shower no later than 2 weeks after the shower. For wedding gifts, you should send your thank you cards no later than 2 weeks after you arrive home from your honey moon. When in doubt, send a thank you in writing. It is a very personal way to connect with someone, especially when they’ve acknowledged this wonderful period in your life.
Along with Target, there are several online websites you can use to create custom thank you cards and stationary. While national online retailors do offer a great selection, I prefer supporting local businesses in your community. You may want to search google for a local stationiare who sells quality preprinted stationary or offers custom designs.
